Am I Saving Her or Killing Her?

Cancer is such a confusing beast. So many questions. No clear path. Don’t worry – they’re all rhetorical questions. I have an amazing vet oncologist but sometimes there just aren’t answers.

Did she puke blood because the chemo is eating her stomach or because it’s killing the bad cells in her lungs?

If all she’ll eat is Little Smokies, shouldn’t I just let her have them?

Why do those damn little sausages smell so bad on the way back up?

How do you know when you’re helping her and when you’re hurting her? Where is the line and why can’t I see it?

We’ve dropped the dasatsnib dose and are trying the every other day plan. And there are still good moments. I know the picture below is sideways, but I’m on my phone and it doesn’t like the edit buttons. Hanging in there. Thanks for all the support.


11 thoughts on “Am I Saving Her or Killing Her?”

  1. Lovely photo hang in there you are doing all you can and just relish those good moments. she knows you love her, hugs

    1. Thank you. I know she always feels loved and can still give it in return in little bursts. She kissed my tears away this morning.

  2. Ok, here goes. If you think the Metronomic drug you are using isn’t helping or its disagreeing with her you can stop it. Nothing says you have to continue with that drug or any drug. If you think you just want to let Abby enjoy being a dog and not give her that at all then we all support that decision. You know her, you know yourself. You tried. That’s what you can say.
    Maybe try Leukeran or Cytoxan those are always options as well. Don’t make yourself doubt what you are doing. We have enough of those doubts.
    I know when Sassy wouldn’t eat her regular dog food I gave her what she would eat with some supplements. She never lost weight.
    Some humans & dogs have different taste buds when on Chemo. Also I attended a seminar on foods/cancer by a holistic vet. Let me see if i can find it. Some food properties feed the cancers. Osteoscarma is considered a Hot Cancer so we want to feed cool foods.
    here is the link to the write up I did

    Thinking of you and Abby

    1. Thank you for the resources. We are definitely done with chemo, but also think the end is rapidly approaching. Just loving her to the end.

  3. I think. This is the question every owner dreads. When is enough and when do I know she’s had enough and the list goes on.
    If you can’t see it then maybe it’s because she’s not ready to give up and neither are you.
    I know dogs always manage to tell us when they really don’t want to keep going and I think u would know if that time is now or not.
    I think u need to stop giving yourself a hard time as she knows u love her and she loves you right back xxxxx
    Lots of love me and Leo X X

    1. Thank you. I’m just listening to her now and think the answer is becoming obvious. My husband and I will talk with our boys tonight. 🙁

      1. Awww I am so very sorry. I will be thinking of you and give her a big hug from Me and my little Leo

  4. Right in the feels. I had these thoughts months ago when my girl had her front leg removed. It was her spirit and willingness to still push on that I stuck with. If she was willing to go, then I would too. I made her a deal, if she continues to give her love and wiggle her stubby, then I’ll do my best to keep her healthy. That was a few months back. Rotties will let you know, they always seem to. Best wishes,

  5. Give her all the dang Lil’ Smokies she wants! Love and spoil, spoil, spoil.

    With all my heart, hoping for a turnaround. No matter what, she is surrounded by your love, and you by hers, eternally. May that bring you comfort.

    Much love,

    Sally and My Chunky Spiritual Being Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle and Frankie

    Sending you all the love in tne world.

  6. I want to add, if you haven’t already done so, just double check to make sure she doesn’t have a fever, an infection, etc. A fever can make a dog feel miserable. As Michelle noted, sometimes the treatment can cause bad temporary problems too.

    You are in my thoughts.

    Sending you love

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